Nothing I can say could aid this.

A malapropism (from French mal à propos, "ill to purpose") is an incorrect usage of a word by substituting a similar-sounding word with different meaning, usually with comic effect. The term comes from the name of Mrs. Malaprop, a character in Richard Brinsley Sheridan's comedy, The Rivals (1775), whose name was in turn derived from the existing English word malapropos, meaning "inappropriately".

# "V.D. Day!" (i.e. V-E Day) — Edith Bunker (as played by Jean Stapleton), on television's All in the Family.
# "My nipple."(i.e. dimple) — Malaysian singer Siti Nurhaliza when asked what is her best facial feature.
# "My magnificent octopus!" (i.e. magnum opus) — Baldric, Blackadder the Third
# "Worst case Ontario..." (i.e. scenario) — Ricky, Trailer Park Boys
# "She's just going through a phrase." (i.e. phase) — Ricky, Trailer Park Boys
# "I might just fade into Bolivian, you know what I mean?" (i.e. oblivion) — Mike Tyson
# "I really dig Hannibal. Hannibal had real guts. He rode elephants into Cartilage." (i.e. Carthage) — Mike Tyson
-http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malapropism