And so, the mystery of my high wages deepens...

A survey conducted by London Guildhall University of 11,000 people showed that (subjectively) good-looking people earn more. Less attractive people earned, on average, 13% less than more attractive people, while the penalty for overweight was around 5%.
-http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beauty

So you see, cosmetic surgery is not vanity. It is in fact a canny and intelligent investment. Really. Truly. Honestly. When I save up enough money, I'm going to become completely remade. New skin, new face, new body. Then, and only then will I enter politics, armed with the prerequisite tools to make my image, if not my ideas, attractive.